ali_kira

So while I was in Indianapolis, there was literally like unlimited access to food. And I love variety so definitely overate. Not perhaps as badly as I could have, but I definitely ate more than I needed. Once I got home I was back to my more normal habits of grazing a bit, so that has been a bit better... or at least it was until Friday where ridiculous amounts of food was available due to the nature of the conference I was attending (Forum for Information Professionals). That conference was pretty awesome: my talk went well, and I had fun giving out door prizes and talking to people. I also ended up taking quite a good amount of leftover pasta salad to JD's afterward.

Yesterday was another long day, and again I ate a bit more than perhaps I needed to (though by the time I ate lunch I was so hungry that it felt like the right thing to do, given that I was volunteering all day at a Harry Potter themed event for kids, and we had a bunch of volunteers no-show at our station [grumble]). I was only thirsty once I returned home, so only really had a lime/raspberry drink in the evening (lime juice blended with frozen raspberries, ice and water) before heading to bed.

Today on the otherhand, I had no place I had to be all day. Which is nice, given that I have had a lot to catch up on (I've accomplished a bit of it, though not as much as I would like in any estimation). I cooked some lasagna but it really wasn't as awesome as it was the last time I made it (given that I was out of many of the ingredients and made substitutions). It wasn't bad, however. My stomach hates me for it though, probably because I have consumed all too much milk today (cereal for breakfast, chocolate milk, and then cheesy lasagna). I don't think I happen to be lactose intolerant or anything, but I know that if I consume TOO MUCH milk I do tend to get an upset stomach. At the same time, I often find cheese settles my stomach, so really I make little sense to me. Does anyone have any thoughts? I wish I knew a hard and fast limit or guideline for myself, but I haven't yet figured one out.

Anyway, I hope that the fact that I actually cooked today means that I'll get back into the habit.

This weekend at SLKP Conference, someone described me as an "old soul". I'm not sure really as to the veracity of that claim, but I can certainly identify with the idea behind it. I don't really fit Generation Y or even Generation X (seeing as my birthday is near enough to the start of Generation Y and all, given the Generation labels), mind you, I don't imagine anyone really fits a Generational description to a T to put it mildly, but this got me thinking.

The reason I was thinking about generations was because of a session at the conference that we CKI administrators took part in, learning about the general traits of all the different generations in the room, plus generation Z (and the oldest members of generation Z are in 12th grade essentially), along with brainstorming what events shaped the time frame in which these individuals were born.

Growing up, it was often said that I was "born in the wrong generation". And while I wouldn't give up my life for the world, I can understand why this was said, if you consider my taste in music at that time in my life, my love for old-fashioned technologies, letter writing, books, etc., and well, more recently my knack of being able to spend a considerable amount of time with those who are decades my senior in chronological age.

I really wonder how this pigeon-holing myself as "not of this generation" in tendencies and habits has shaped my worldview. I also wonder how I really would have gotten on had I been born in a different generation. Sure I might be close to people in age, but I certainly do not find myself all that similar to those I advise in CKI for example, when it comes to those typifying generational traits, and yet, I was born into the same generation.

Perhaps these are just superficial thoughts... but I wonder at the fact that I often exhibit behaviours common in the "silent generation" and also whether labels I have dealt with for so many years has had a significant impact on my life and my behaviour. Right now, I am realizing for the first time in a long time, that I really truly need to go through some major self-improvement, and change.

And I wonder what being "an old soul" might have to do with all of it. There is so much to think about.

This morning I unpacked (yes I didn't procrastinate as much as I often do this time). And now, I'm slowly getting ready for my day in other terms. There is much to do, including research assistantship work, but I'll get it done.

SLKP Conference was just what I needed to become more motivated about all areas of my life (not just my Kiwanis-related ones). I really do feel strongly that I can effect some powerful change in my Kiwanis involvements in the coming weeks/months/years. I've also realized some great things about myself while I was gone. Sure, I didn't really leave the hotel much while in Indianapolis, but I had a great time, got to know some fabulous Kiwanians that I hadn't known previously as well as have a good time with Kiwanians that I've already known for some time.

The flights were a bit messed up (one late flight meant a missed connection on the way to Indy and one canceled flight meant a whole new set of flights on the way home), but I saw some good movies (Arthur, Contagion, and The Princess Diaries. I tried to watch The Lincoln Lawyer, but I didn't much like it so gave up after about 20 minutes). While in Indy, I ate (far too much) good food, and spent a lot of time sitting rather than being active, but am not that much worse for wear, even though I may not have slept as much as I should (since when does one ever sleep enough at a conference?).

I have become reinvigorated about my role as CKI administrator and hope to continue to work in this area for the coming weeks and years until I can really get the district into the shape that I want it to be. Of course this process takes a lot of work, so I won't be doing it alone, clearly. Working together is a key part of Kiwanis involvement and I really do feel passionate about this 97 year old organization of which I am a part.

Now I had best go back to organizing, catching up and yes doing research assistantship work.

... life goes on. I've managed to rewatch all of Firefly, the movie Serenity, and of course other things besides. I hosted people for board games last night which meant that I *gasp* vacuumed, swept, cleaned, did dishes, took out the trash, and cooked up a delicious lasagna (vegetarian recipe my mom sent me via email -- thanks Mom!). I think I'm going to have people over to play board games much more regularly in the coming weeks/months. Partially as it forces me to be more social (and I really truly need it), but also because that way I don't feel so board game deprived, and also have an excuse to cook for other people (cooking for one isn't all that fun, to be honest). There were no lasagna leftovers, so my cooking was certainly a success! I do have some chips and other goodies of course left for future gatherings, and know that the empty-ish room in my apt works well for Pictionary, so that's always good!

Of course entertaining people at home means that I actually take the time to do some of the more routine deeper cleaning tasks that I occasionally neglect, so that's always good too.

But yes, I am having a really hard time getting motivated. I've evidently quite a few tasks I should be working on and very little interest in any of them, to be honest. I feel much more emotional these days, which is pretty awesome at times but more often than not is because I feel lonely or somewhat direction-less which isn't entirely accurate, but is how I somehow feel. Frustrating more than anything.

I hope that this coming week's trip to Indianapolis for Kiwanis will help perk up my spirits/my motivation, and that eventually I feel more motivated to do more, whether it be exercise, see friends, leave the house, or perhaps most importantly work on my research!

In other news it's rather cold in here. Last night the apartment felt too warm, and today it feels chilly. Not horribly cold but cold enough that I'm wearing a sweater zipped up and slippers. I guess winter really has returned, eh?

Last night it struck me that for the first time in what seemed like ages I felt lonely, truly lonely. It made sense of course, as it had been a week since I began living alone again, and it is a pretty significant adjustment. As I long ago realized, I do much better if I do at least ONE thing outside of the house a day and/or do at least one thing involving other people. Sure I do enjoy hermiting myself on occasion, but having that outlet of at least someone to talk to and/or do something with is something I'll miss, living alone again, regardless of whom it was whom I was previously living with.

That said, I've been having a pretty decent time with the spare time that I have had at my disposal (I'm in between tasks on some of my research projects and whatnot). Firstly, I've been watching a fair bit of media: season 3 of Castle, a whole bunch of the free iTunes TV shows they were providing for the holidays (some were terrible, a few I might actually check out and watch more of at some point), That 70s Show (I never did finish watching the DVDs I got a while back) etc. I've been reading (a few magazines, short stories, and now my AWESOME Absolute Sandman Vol 1!), exercising (mostly Wii games at the moment...), cleaning (what with JD moving out, it is pretty ideal to be cleaning at least a bit), and gaming (mostly iPod Touch games, but last night I started playing Guitar Hero Aerosmith, which it turns out I actually really enjoy!).

So I guess I'm having a vacation of sorts post-vacation. And the me-time is well deserved. I do have to be careful -- my wrists are trying to start acting up again. And I still have to be productive -- my research work isn't going to disappear any time soon, but I guess I needed this.

I guess the new year behooves me to make a post of some sort regarding what I've learned in the past year and what I guess I can foretell for the coming year. I don't always do this, certainly, but it's a decent idea.

2011 in retrospective
- I lived with a current significant other for the very first time. I like to think I learned a lot about myself and about relationships in general because of this. It meant a different type of time management because there was more than just myself to pay attention to when scheduling and much more.
- I had my longest romantic relationship (which ended in 2011 on good terms). It was really great for my personal development. I know that I learned a lot about my particular quirks (both good and bad) and look forward to a time when I do have a relationship with someone whose long term goals mesh more closely with my own. That said, I don't have regrets. I'm happy, and I've gained another person in my life who knows me very well. That plus, a realization that my resistance to change can be surmounted, as he challenged me (and continues to challenge me) to consider other options.
- I finished all the course work for my Masters degrees. This to me is a huge accomplishment, as it will likely mean that I will finish them completely in 2012 (likely convocating in November, hopefully finishing my thesis in the summer).
- I traveled considerably: Indianapolis, Jamaica, Victoria, Red Deer, Switzerland, Washington DC, Virginia, Maryland, etc. I do adore traveling, and actually qualified for Aeroplan status for the first time ever!
- I began working on new research projects both for my thesis and for my research assistantship. This has meant a lot more stress, but also a lot of new skill development.
- I got an iPod Touch (which has meant playing a lot of casual games) and an Android phone (which has meant much less resistance to capacitive touch screen technology).
- I've also been shopping to regular retail stores a lot less, and to online stores much more frequently.
- I joined Reddit (and RedditGifts with the great Secret Santa)
- I started making a good deal of free purchases from Quirky.com (free because of the influence I have made on their products).
- I became involved with conference presentation review.

2012 plans
- I hope to finish these degrees, getting the thesis done this summer and convocating in the fall.
- I want to host more frequent board game nights -- I want to work on my social life, and be a better friend than I have been.
- I plan on continuing to exercise regularly. Fitocracy is a great tool for this and I hope that playing my Wii games, doing social things with friends, and biking more all help to add up to increased physical fitness. It is all too easy to be a couch potato when a Grad student. I also want to use my yoga passes and attend yoga more frequently... if my wrists allow I'd also consider getting back into dancing/pole dancing or taking up another sport/activity entirely.
- I want to become employed in a job that I truly feel passionate about/enjoy following the completion of these degrees, hopefully in 2012.
- I want to cook more frequently at home, and waste less food. I adore food and hope to go to the farmer's market more often, buy from T&T for specialty items, and generally be more adept in the kitchen. This likely means treating friends to more food at home.
- That said I also want to travel, eat good food at restaurants, and have new experiences.
- I want to make a dent in my 'to read' bookshelf in the sense that I want to read more.
- I also want to make a dent in my 'to watch' movie list among other things.
- I want to stay on top of email, and to make sure to clean or organize at least one thing every day.
- There are a lot of hopes and dreams I have for my future... and these are but a few of my goals/hopes for the coming year. Above all else, of course I want to have a sense of balance in my life -- this is always something I strive for, but don't always obtain.

... and while I guess I need not type about all that's going on at the moment, it's not necessarily been a bad one. Very emotional, but that's the nature of the beast. It was good to see a friend of mine who lives in the UK these days. It was good to eat some yummy food at Famoso last night and catch up. Gotta love eating Famoso for breakfast -- even if breakfast is late in the day due to not exactly sleeping well.

The future holds a lot of uncertainty, I guess. But I'm a bit more ready for that than I might otherwise be. I'm looking forward to 2012 -- 2011 wasn't a bad one, for certain, however. I learned a lot about myself, I still have tons to learn though. And hopefully it will be with the help of my friends.

And that, is the thing. I'm not terribly amazing at maintaining my friendships. I place a lot more personal value/worth on seemingly insignificant moments and interactions with those whom I appreciate/value than perhaps necessary on occasion, but I'm not so good at maintaining friendships. I do want to work on this area of my life however. I'm very very thankful for where I am right now, and the people who have led me to become whom I have become and will eventually be.

This week, as most Christmas holiday weeks, I have spent quite a bit of time watching media. And learning from it. The new Blu-ray player is getting a lot of use, as I watch Castle.

Yes, I'm stressed: both emotionally and with relation to school/work etc. But I'm happy for it. Happy for what 2011 has brought me, and for what the future should bring. I'm going to take some criticisms to heart and hope that the people I care about now and in the future continue to help me grow and develop into a better and happier person -- both with the good and bad. It's all a learning experience after all.

So it feels great to have such awesome family and friends around Christmas. And as I've always thought: Christmas is for time with family (Tim Minchin's White Wine in the Sun isn't my favorite Christmas song for nothing!). While my brother is currently in South America, and won't receive his Christmas presents until he returns, I did get to have some good times with the family that is around.

On the 20th JD and I went out to see the Wedding Singer at the Mayfield Dinner Theatre to celebrate our second anniversary as a couple. I really enjoyed both the show and the food. And JD seemed to have a good time too -- particularly as it was a musical sans-The Beatles (he's not a Beatles fan). I adore live theatre.

On the 23rd, I finally began to catch up on the Internet things that I haven't had the chance to catch up on previously... I think it'll take at least another day or two to get completely caught up but, at least I don't have to declare email bankruptcy or anything! :) It felt good to have been done preparations for Christmas by that point such that I could really just enjoy.

The 24th was Christmas with my folks. I got spoiled with awesome food, great presents and the opportunity to see family! My nephew answered the door, excited about presents (he got to open OUR presents first this year!), and we brought in our gifts. Once my brother and his girlfriend were over and my dad was awake we were able to open the gifts and well -- I adore seeing people's reactions to that which I brought them. I also got spoiled with money, tea, the third season of Castle on DVD, the first Absolute Sandman (oh my gawsh am I ever happy about that gift! Sure there's four more of them, but I never even imagined that I would get the first one! So happy!!), the book The Wisdom of Whores (a nice non-fiction read about the HIV/AIDS epidemic, which I plan to read -- it's vaguely relevant to my thesis, but I hope to just enjoy it, more than anything), and well, I still have one brother to spoil, so I imagine the exchange of gifts isn't exactly over (especially since JD has a gift that will show up in January among other things). Food was delicious, and my dad got Cowboys and Aliens as a gift on Blu-ray so we watched that! What a fun (not at all holiday related) film to watch! (JD made fun of my reactions to it... but I did still enjoy it muchly).

And then Christmas day was spent with JD's family, complete with gift opening (apparently I have to take him shopping for new shirts in January as the ones that he received didn't fit him properly, but that'll work out well enough), way too much yummy food, and some really interesting conversations. We even played a board game: You Don't Say which was actually a ton of fun!

All in all it has been a great Christmas! Today's Boxing Day and we did all of our shopping (okay JD shopped, I mostly just encouraged him to buy me the Christmas present of a Blu-Ray player from Best Buy sales on the 24th) online meaning that sleeping in was the order of the day. Darn darkness makes sleeping far too appealing... ah well, the days ARE getting longer!

So, while I occasionally manage to finish essays and assignments (one left for the semester and then it's just RAwork and thesising all the way!), Christmas happenings have started to overtake the month -- I guess as per the usual. Yesterday I volunteered at the South Edmonton Kiwanis Club's Christmas Tree lot (I ran the cash register mostly... the credit/debit machine was one of the simplest/easiest to use ever! :) ), and then went over to JD's mom's to see how their tree was shaping up. JD's niece was super cute walking in JD's shoes!

My brother asked me for a Christmas wish list last night, and I guess I completely forgot to put one together, so here goes (in no particular order of course, though I'm going to put it in categories I think):
MUSIC
Tim Minchin
Paul & Storm
Charlie McDonnell
Light Organ Records: Our First Christmas (album)
Dr. Horrible Soundtrack

BOOKS
Absolute Sandman 1-5 by Neil Gaiman
The Wisdom of Whores by Elizabeth Pisani
Castle: Richard Castle's Deadly Storm by Brian Michael Bendis (graphic novel)

OTHER
The Guild Season 5 (on DVD)
Castle season 3 (on DVD) [there are probably other shows I should put here, but this is a good start... I guess I would also love Criminal Minds as I don't already have any of the seasons and would like to see them all]
Shirts from xkcd store: Collatz Conjecture, self-descriptive shirt, raptor polo - Female cut (all in small)
Graphic Novels
A glass pen
Fun board Games that I don't already have (the time to play them too! ;) )
I guess iPod apps and/or iTunes music downloads would be good too, though I likely have enough apps for the time being (not that they're not super fun though!)
Popcap Games are also awesome -- though really I don't need more distractions, do I?
An eliptical machine (not that we have the space for one, of course, but someday...)
Good food, good experiences, good friends, good health, good travels!
A real time turner (or the ability to be in more than one place at once! :) )
Computer upgrade stuff [ask JD] (yeah, JD's right this computer probably needs an upgrade, though I do love the way it is set up now).
I would probably really love an iPad though it's not a 'must have' item, but rather an item I would just enjoy.
I want to see a ton of good movies that I haven't already...
A better travel bag: essentially a bag that could be easily used for carry on only travel, but which can actually fit everything I want to bring effectively. My current bags are great for checked luggage or carry on if I'm only going for like a weekend, but I would like something smaller than my big bags and somewhat larger than my smaller carry on items.
I guess that's all I can think up other than the obvious of getting my assignments done, catching up on research work, having a good time, spending time with my awesome family and friends, and getting my thesis done as appropriate. My life is a good one. Of course I enjoy volunteering, helping others and other efforts toward making the world a better place, but given the fact that my brother asked for the list, it's a bit more of an item-focused one for his appreciation.

In other news, I'm really enjoying participating in gift exchanges this year: the GoldfishLegs gift looks so intriguing! I look forward to opening it! My re-gift exchange was fun too (I got lavender Epsom salts). And then I really hope I get something from the RedditGifts Secret Santa 2011 gift exchange -- I had such fun putting together a gift for that one!

Tim Minchin's White Wine in the Sun is my favorite Christmas song I think as of late:


Anyway, that aside... lately I've been trying my best to get healthy. I honestly don't have much of an appetite -- though I've been eating. I've been drinking tonnes of tea though and water and other beverages. I've been sleeping a lot, and I've generally been just healthy enough to do what I need to be doing (but barely). I called in sick to work to recuperate (one of the best decisions of the week, as it's allowed me to be healthy enough to attend various events in the last couple of days for networking purposes, Christmas purposes, fun, and well yes life balance.

You see this is my last term of classes. I'm done the in-person part of classes, and have only three assignments left (2 small ones and one large one). And it's important to me that I take advantage of the opportunities that present themselves.

So earlier this week I had my last three in-person classes, though Wednesday's class essentially consisted of our prof treating us to breakfast at the High Level Diner as a thank you for some help we gave him for a research project. I dragged myself out of bed for that one, which was good, as I spent the majority of the rest of the day in bed after running errands on campus.

Thursday I went to the Butterdome Craft Sale -- my annual traditional start of Christmas shopping. And like usual I bought a mix of things for myself (and the household) and items for gifts and/or for Christmas. I got my Reddit Secret Santa's remaining gift items, a small present for JD and some of the usual. Plus for myself I got this lovely wrap sweater from Luved Clothing (this is the most similar listing I could find for it actually -- it's super comfy I've worn it all day!), a scarf from Bab's (honestly I can only splurge a little -- I am still a grad student afterall!), a zipper pull (ladybug!), a brown sugar bear (well it's coincidentally shaped like a ladybug too, but don't read anything into that -- those were just the cutest designs those craft-makers had), and some delicious food items.

In the afternoon I attended SLISmas (the School of Library and Information Studies' Holiday party). It was unfortunate that I wasn't up to eating most of the goodies, because there really were a lot of things to try!! But I did enjoy the punch and the mandarin oranges and candy canes... and a bit of bland snacks, though really there weren't many of those. What was better was really connecting with some of the other students -- I honestly don't take enough time to do that, and in the job world, these connections might really make a difference: the library world isn't all that big in reality. And hey, my fellow students are more than just cool -- they're certifiably awesome (okay that's a definition that I've made up, but I mean it -- we had such great conversations about pedagogy, pteradons, grad school, children, food, work/life/school balance, cultural differences, religion, politics, marriage, and well... probably more of the typically taboo topics than I normally get to talk about in such a great manner!

Today my first plan was cancelled so I got some extra well-needed sleep before heading to the NAHLA Christmas luncheon and re-gift exchange (I got a bag of lavender Epsom salts... which should come in handy). We were at Pampa Brazilian Steakhouse (I finally got to eat there!) and while I still had no real appetite, I did eat rather well, and very healthily, all things told. My favorite meats were the steaks and chicken. Like usual the pineapple is one of my favorite things, and ALL the items I tried from the salad bar were delicious -- this is a great thing, as I normally have a hard time discerning what to get from a buffet of any type as I'm often a poor judge of what I would like. The conversation was great and the gift exchange was totally fun too!

In the evening I attended the GELA pub night at Elephant and Castle. I must have asked the waitress for more hot water for my tea 4 times, but it was what was keeping me going. I nibbled a bit on the provided platters of pub grub for sharing, but what made that event awesome was the conversations. I really am in the right place when I interact so well with members of the profession I wish to join... aren't I?

So while outside of these events I'm not getting too much done (and I certainly need to), life goes generally well, and I'm doing my best to stave off further illness. Christmas is coming and I do love this time of year so much -- even if it has to be ridden with homework, research and other stress-inducing times if combined with illness.